I bought my mother-in-law a condo — and she took out a $30,000 car loan. Now she refuses to get a roommate.

Quentin Fottrell

Sun, Jun 8, 2025, 9:30 AM 5 min read

I have a complicated money issue. About 3 years ago, my mother-in-law was widowed and she subsequently was evicted from her rental home that she could no longer afford. Even though her late husband made a six-figure income for 30 years, they had no savings and routinely filed for bankruptcy (every 7 years) due to her being irresponsible with credit.

To save her from being homeless after the eviction, my husband and I let my mother-in-law move in with us for 6 months, but it quickly became an untenable situation as my husband and his mother do not get along. So we purchased a condo in a high-cost-of-living area and have been allowing her to live in it rent-free since 2022.

• ‘He failed in his fiduciary duty’: My brother liquidated our mother’s 401(k) for her nursing home. He claimed the rest.

• ‘The situation is extreme’: I’m 65 and leaving my estate to only one grandchild. Can the others contest my will?

• My new husband gave me a contract and told me to ‘sign here’ — but I refused. It was the best decision of my life.

• ‘I’m not wildly wealthy, but I’ve done well’: I’m 79 and have $3 million in assets. Should I set up 529 plans for my grandkids?

• My daughter’s boyfriend, a guest in my home, offered to powerwash part of my house — then demanded money

We’ve previously asked her to contribute $500 a month to cover the HOA, but she always comes up with excuses as to why she can’t pay. We’ve suggested that she get a roommate so she’s not out any money. Again, more excuses and she refuses to change. Our total payment for the condo is $2,800 a month.

While we can technically afford it, I am resentful that she doesn’t pay her fair share. She has received a small inheritance, an annuity and also receives Social Security so she’s not penniless. We are a double-income household, but I really want to quit my job to be a stay-at-home mom as I have 3 young kids. If I do that, we can’t afford to pay for the condo.

Please help me with some advice on this seemingly impossible situation. I don’t want to make my mother-in-law homeless, but I don’t want to light myself on fire to keep someone else warm either as she refuses to contribute towards the roof over her head. Also, she recently filed for bankruptcy again and promptly “bought” a $30,000 used car on 25% interest.

Please help. I am at my wits end and I think about this daily.

Wife & Daughter-in-Law

Related: ‘He gave me a week to get out’: My son and I bought a house — now I’m homeless and living in a car. Can I sue him?

It’s time for her to meet you halfway.